5 Tips To Cheating On Your “Better Half”
The better half is exactly what they are if you are deciding to cheat. If you are currently a cheater or even thinking about cheating, you are not alone. Some studies have shown that as many as 10% of married couples cheat on their spouses. I, for one, have never cheated, but I have friends and family that have gone through it time and time again. Based on their experiences mixed with some common sense, here is what I’ve come up with to help you get away with cheating. The five best tips to cheating!
The worst thing that you can do when cheating is try keep both people in the dark. The best thing you can do is find a partner that understands the situation and is just in it for the fun. Ladies, if you are cheating on your guy, you should have no problem finding a guy that will keep the relationship a secret. Fellas’, this is quite the difficult task for you. Finding a woman that doesn’t mind being the “other woman” will prove to be a daunting task. Once she is found, one wrong move on your part and the beans will be spilled. My suggestion for men who want to cheat is to not hook up with the same girl twice. Random girls using a fake name is the way to go.
Especially if you live in a small town. In a small town everybody knows everybody’s business. Anything that you think is a secret is far from it. The “juicy” gossip is not only known by everybody but usually turned into a story that takes on a life of its own. Also chances are that if you are cheating on your spouse with somebody that lives in your town, your spouse knows the person. This is obviously bad news. Living in a bigger city makes cheating easier to get away with but it’s still not a smart thing to cheat with somebody that is within minutes of where you live with your spouse. Wait until one of you go out of town and then have your fun.
Now that we have decided that we will not cheat within a short driving distance of home, let’s not tell anybody when we come home. I don’t care if it’s your best friend since you were 3 years old, DON’T TELL 'EM! A secret is not a secret once it is shared. The person you thought you could trust tells somebody that they think they can trust and this repeats until it gets back to your spouse. By then the story will go from you cheated to you knocked somebody up or got knocked up. If you cheat, be sure and shut up about it.
This is the dumbest thing you could do if your other person text or calls you. A friend of mine’s girlfriend was cheating on him and she disguised the other guy’s number as her friend “Jamie.” He thought it was pretty weird when “Jamie was talking about how he wanted “she” wanted to see her naked again. Even if you have full trust of your spouse, when your phone is unattended, they can’t resist. Keep it on you at all times or better yet, don’t give out your number.
The last thing you need to worry about when cheating on your spouse is keeping track of your web of lies. Keep the lies small. If you’re asked “Why are you late?” Just come back with a simple answer like “So and so was late for work and I had to cover.” Do not answer with “Well, I left work late and I was speeding home and a cop pulled me over and gave me a long warning and then I hit a nail and flattened my tire and didn’t have any tools to change it so I had to wait on AAA and while I was waiting Bob passed by so when my tire was fixed I followed him to the bar and we had a few drinks and yada yada yada.” When you tell a complex lie, you have to remember word for word what you said because your spouse will and they will be sure to bring up you being late again and will expect the exact same answer. Chances are you won’t give it to them.
These are just a few tips for all you cheaters or wanna be cheaters. Don’t get the wrong idea. I’m very happy in my relationship and would never even think of cheating. That being said, some heartache can be saved for the victim of cheaters if they never find out.